One mom is sick and tired of the haters and complainers on Facebook.
Naila Culpepper: It seems to be the norm now. Unhappy with your court-ordered judgment? Twitter your pain. Celebrity? Perfect! Or even better, dedicate your status on Facebook so all eight hundred of your friends and fans know the one thing you know for sure:
Your ex-husband/boyfriend/baby daddy is a deadbeat dad.
After all, he deserves it, right? He doesn't love your child, doesn't pay what the court ORDERED him to, never sees your child, and has replaced you. Why shouldn't you let cyberspace know there is yet another deadbeat walking?
Because you are the mom, and you know better. Because what's best for your child is more important than you getting even.
At one point in time, you at least liked him. Granted, it may have been before prohibition, but you DID get pregnant -- with HIM. So somewhere between conception and present day, things have run aground. You yell instead of purr, your calls that used to get answered on the first ring now go straight to voicemail. You maintained your composure for the first few go-rounds, and figure a day-long Twitter rant will show him.
I get it. I have children, and I have had days when the thoughts that invade my head would make a crazy woman look sane. Only difference between us is ...
I keep them in my head. Or I scream it out in the shower/car/empty house. Okay, sometimes I tell my mother and my best friend.
But the first moment I held my children in my arms, I made a promise to them that I would never do anything to intentionally harm them.
That includes speaking badly of their fathers, no matter what. Hear that? NO MATTER WHAT! When I hear women talk badly of their babies' fathers, with so much emotion and venom, I always leave imprinted more by the behavior of the mom than the actions of the dad. If the father is all the awful that you are professing him to be, I'll take an educated guess that he won't be moved by your public outrage to do better.
Which means it's really all about you. And isn't it supposed to be about your child?
|Naila is a single working mom who is slightly fanatical about all Boston sports, has two great kids, a 13-year-old daughter who watches the U.S. Debt Clock, and a new baby who smiles hugely every time he sees her or his bottle.|