Honey, Have a Piece of Divorce Cake

Natalee Holloway | Sandra Bullock's Stepkids | Year-Old Happy Meal

Honey, Have a Piece of Divorce Cake

Friday, December 11, 2009

filed under: divorce logic

When I first read about this new trend of women celebrating their divorces -- with cakes! -- I thought the idea was hilarious.

Single Mom Seeking: Check out my favorite cake -- via the Daily Mail -- in which a woman is pushing her ex OFF the cake. Ha.

When I first heard about these break-up cakes, it seemed like the most positive, light-hearted way to say goodbye to your pain and celebrate your new journey with friends.

But that's when Dr. Leah Klungness, aka The Sanity Fairy, chimed in about the reality of these "celebrations" if you have kids.

Sure, having a break up party with an outrageous cake might be a great way to celebrate the end of your relationship, she told me. Especially if the legal wranglings were seemingly endless, this could be a symbolic way to move on.

However, Dr. Leah warns:

"If you feel that a "divorce party" is something you want, make sure that your kids are NOT invited."

How true: it might be all light for you, but your kids would see things in an entirely different way. Surely, they would be hurt and confused by your celebration of an event that has been devastating to them.

"That why you need to seriously consider your kids' feelings if you're planning such a party," Dr. Leah adds.

We're sure that you have something to say about this:

If you're in the middle of a divorce, have you considered baking a cake to celebrate?

If you've gone through a divorce and could turn the clocks back, would you have thrown a "break up party" like this?

Rachel Sarah, a.k.a. "Single Mom Seeking" blogs at SingleMomSeeking.com and co-founded SingleMommyHood.com, the first-ever website to offer "a whole new way to think about life."

filed under: divorce logic

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7 comments so far | Post a comment now >>

I’m divorced and personally, I wouldn’t have done this. By the time my divorce was finalized, I was drained emotionally. I had really wanted my marriage to work, and I was mourning the death of the dreams we’d had together. Although I was the one who initiated the split, it still doesn’t mean I was glib about it.

- MarMar

Posted 12/11/09 08:06 AM

Since 70% of divorces are filed by women, and they get the kids, the house, the car, and an extra paycheck, I could see how it would turn into a celebration of privilege. I have to agree with the psychologist though, including your kids in this would be an overt act of alienating the other parent, ESPECIALLY in no-fault cases. So celebrate the laws of attrition if you must, but remember, spite was part of the divorce, continuing it is a show of justification and vindication of responsibility and accountability when children are involved. It has no honor, but that’s not really what it is about, is it?

- Steve

Posted 12/11/09 09:33 AM

Steve raising kids is no joke

- Anonymous

Posted 12/11/09 11:12 AM

Certainly not a joke to me, but apparently it is to many others…laugh and celebrate…

- Steve

Posted 12/11/09 12:14 PM

A Celebration of a failed marriage…Gee, wonder why you’re divorced?

- True Mom

Posted 12/11/09 02:31 PM

Just look at the picture of the cake. Is it not domestic violence if a woman instigates it. Why should that be used as the celebratory topping? Do you think the guy gets one with him punching her? Party if you feel Like it, but the picture is disgusting and should be protested by domestic violence groups across the country!!

- Logical

Posted 12/11/09 05:55 PM

Why would anyone want to get married?The institution should be phased out.50% of first marriages end in divorce,67% of second marriages end the same way and over 70% of third marriages.I will just stick with co-habitating…when and if we decide to split up we will each go our seperate way with out sticking our hand in one anothers pocket.

- Gary

Posted 12/28/09 04:17 PM