As little girls growing up watching Disney movies, we are told that fairy tales come true, and that if we find our Prince Charming, we will live happily ever after. Well, what do you think Tiger Wood's wife, Elin, thinks about that now?
Flying Solo with Two Carry-Ons: They say 50 percent of all marriages end in divorce. While that may be true, after years of chatting with friends, it is my opinion that wedded bliss rarely ever exists and almost everyone is miserable. I would actually say that maybe 1 percent of those who tied the knot are truly happy and are still in love with their spouse, even after years of married life.
A couple years ago, I was out with a small group of friends. Two of the gals were married with children. The other gal was there with her boyfriend of two years. She wanted to get married. He, on the other hand, was apprehensive, since none of his friends or family were happily married. And after what my friend Elizabeth said to them, you can bet that he would never marry anyone.
Feeling unhappy and stuck in her own marriage, Elizabeth looked at Katie and said, "Let me tell you something that no one ever tells you about marriage. One day you'll go to bed praying that he dies on the 405 freeway."
Oh come on, don't be horrified. You know you all have thought it at least one time ... unless you are one of the lucky ones in that 1 percent.
To those of you married, unmarried, or ever thinking of getting married, I offer some advice that I have accumulated from my much wiser sisters who have gone through this before me.
• Don't bother changing your name. It's a pain to do when you get married, and an even bigger pain changing it back. If you must, just because you are so "in love," tack his name to your maiden name.
• When naming your children, always include your maiden name in theirs. It is crucial if you go back to your maiden name after the divorce. It makes it much easier for medical and legal issues, and when you travel with the kids.
• If you are a stay-at-home mom, the best advice I can give you is to do what you can to save up some F-you money. Take some money wherever you can get it: grocery money, drink one less latte a day, go to the 99 Cent store and pocket the rest. Even if you never get divorced, you can always go out later and buy something nice.
To the outsider, Elin appears to be one of the lucky ones. She has millions of dollars to help make her happy once again. But take it from me, if your ex turns out to be a deadbeat, the extra cash you embezzle from your community accounts will most definitely come in handy.
You might think I'm totally cynical, but no one goes into a marriage thinking they will get divorced -- just ask those 50 percent -- but things do happen, so it's best to be prepared. Unfortunately, I wasn't.