Lately, I've been on a mission to get my groove back.
Kimberly Seals Allers: No, I'm not going on a Stella-inspired trip to Jamaica to find a young man (but do keep reading) -- though that probably wouldn't hurt. But I've been trying to get my sexy back. Not sex, but just that inner vixen that I know simmers underneath my mommy routine. That sexy vibe. The feeling that puts a little swagger in my walk.
I've been finding my moxie lately with my girlfriend, Gina. We put on the Spanx, some sexy stilettos, and after we drop our kids off with the respective "wasbands" for the weekend, we hit up NYC like two hot mamas. Or ... two mamas in heat.
The results are shocking. We go out to let off some steam on the dance floor and are quite happy dancing in our girl circle. But yet, we are always attracting young men like nobody's business. They buy us drinks. They want our numbers. The cougar flag is at full mast and blowing in the wind. We couldn't believe it! One night, we went party-hopping with two young hotties like it was 1999 -- which probably would have been a better year for us because we would have been twenty-something (like they were), not late thirty-something (which we are), and would not have needed five days to recover from our outing. Oh well.
On another one of our nights out, we met a young, fun-loving rickshaw driver who peddles around NYC's popular meatpacking district blasting disco music out of a kitted-out rickshaw complete with booming speakers. When we heard his music, somewhere at the intersection of Grey Goose and tonic (two limes please), we started dancing in the street as he approached us. That apparently got us a free joy ride.
For 20 minutes, he peddled and we partied around New York City, singing with strangers on corners and chair-dancing with everyone who stopped on the street to feel the vibe, enjoy the music, and throw their cares to the wind for 30 seconds. At nearly every corner, someone took a boogie break and stopped to dance as we passed by. It was a truly awesome New York City moment.
For us, it was an exhilarating mommy moment -- you know that kind when you reconnect with the fun-loving gal who, back in the day, was known to put a hurtin' on a dance floor, would break out in spontaneous song, and had the freedom to just hit up a city without a firm plan and just see where the night led you.
This was before our overscheduled lives, only eating at kid-friendly restaurants, and our roles as nurturer, top chef, referee, and chief picker-upper dominated our existence. I love who I am as a mom, but sometimes, I forget who I was before the children -- and it scares me. But on this night, the old Kimberly with a new attitude was back in full effect -- and I remembered how much I like her. How much I like me!
When we stepped off that rickshaw in front of the uber-trendy Gansevoort Hotel, everyone looked at us like we were celebrities. We had a fearless and fun glow that lit up the night. In that moment, we weren't moms, divorcees, or hard-working entrepreneurs. We weren't worried about our businesses, our children, our exes, the laundry, or our bills. In that moment, we were young (in spirit), fierce, and fabulous. And I just loved it!
The line to get into the rooftop lounge of the Gansevoort was wrapped around the block that night, but we walked right up to the front of the line, told the bouncer it was just us girls, and he let us straight in. Even the 6-foot linebacker guy was mesmerized by our charm.
Not bad for two moms on a night out.
|Kimberly Seals Allers is an award-winning business journalist and founder and editor-in-chief of MochaManual.com, a weekly online magazine for moms of color. She is the author of "The Mocha Manual to a Fabulous Pregnancy" and "The Mocha Manual to Turning Your Passion into Profit." Kimberly is a divorcing mother of two and lives on Long Island, NY.|