The infamous cheating golfer pushed me right into the arms of divorce -- and out of a marriage that should've been over long ago.
Marital Mess: Tiger Woods' public apology made me file for divorce. My husband actually used it as an example of what a cheating harlot (that would be me) should do: Take responsibility. Are you f*cking kidding me? I'm being compared to Tiger Woods?!
First of all, I am neither a sex addict nor a public sports figure. Secondly, my husband and I were officially separated when I [committed] "transgressions." I was so offended and disgusted that Tiger Woods' code of honor was being held up as the one I should adhere [to], that I realized this man and I are DONE. The gender divide is strong regarding Tiger's apology; in this case, it's the straw that's breaking my marriage's back. It only further illuminates that my husband and I have two conflicting and completely differing interpretations of reality.
Today my husband called me a DirtySlutWhore; the name-calling was rage-filled and aimed to kill. As disrespectful as that may be -- and as much as I don't think of myself that way -- today I realized that I would actually prefer that title to being called his WIFE. In fact, I'll wear that mantle all day long if it means happiness and freedom from a loveless, soul-sucking marriage [in which] my needs were unimportant and ignored.
We have been separated for six months now, yet I hadn't filed for divorce. We have a 2-year-old son together. Yes, I've had relations with other people during our separation (hence the DirtySlutWhore name-calling), but neither one of us has been willing to pull the trigger and end this marriage.
Until today. I am officially out of limbo. My path has become ever more evident with each interaction with my aforementioned husband, and today he's gone and done it. Today I made the appointment.
I'm moving on. Enough of trying to placate this man. Enough of being afraid of single mommyhood. Enough of limbo. It's time. Anger can be a very productive emotion. I've finished our taxes, vacuumed the entire house, filed for divorce and it's not even noon yet. He may never see the tears I shed in this marriage; the pain I was in while he thought everything was "normal;" all the work I put into it before finally asking for a divorce. All he sees is the DirtySlutWhore, and that's ok. This D.S.W. is moving on. Thanks, Tiger.
And so I pray:
God, grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
The courage to change the things that I can;
And the wisdom to know the difference.