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How Would Jesus Hug?

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Is the joke on you, or have Christians lost it?


Homeschool Mom: I have been all over the Internet looking at the different takes on "Gimme That Christian Side Hug," a rap video that was taken at a youth conference at My Father's House in Vacaville, California. Despite the fact that non-Christians would like to point to this video as blurry photographic evidence that confirms once and for all that Christians are indeed nut jobs (some don't even need blurry videos to believe this), I'm afraid that naysayers will have to continue their search for this elusive beast. This video is a self-deprecating joke put out there for the enjoyment of Christians who can laugh at themselves.

The Christian side hug seems to be akin to the air-kiss that socialites and celebrities are known for. It is a phenomenon that does occur in the Christian ranks, and probably has some correlation to the idea that you should be aware of personal boundaries. The air-kiss, however, is more about not smearing the oil-spill of makeup you wear on the innocent bystanders you must greet in a particularly effusive way (your agent, for instance, or the starlet who is now dating your ex).

While the Christian side hug does actually exist, it is not mandated nor prescribed by scripture. In fact, John Acuff -- the young man who coined the phrase -- actually wrote a book called "Stuff Christians Like," which will be released in April of this year. The book started as a blog, which became popular enough to be developed into a book. Posting number 106 is the one about the Christian side hug, and it reads like this:

Yes, God wants us to be compassionate and kind and tender with each other. Not only that, but he wants us to love our enemies and serve our neighbors. As long as there is no body-on- body action. I'm talking of course about a "full-frontal hug," one of those sinful abominations where you just wrap your arms around a friend and embrace them. That's why Christians the world over have pioneered the "side hug." In the side hug, there's no risk of two crotches touching. Instead of face-to-face, you go side-to-side, putting your arm around the person and your hip against theirs. Still having a hard time mastering it? Pretend you're taking a photo and you're both looking at the camera together. The side hug, or "A frame," as it is also called, is safe for the whole family, friendly and above all holy. I don't know the exact scripture reference, but try the book of Psalms.

Acuff isn't the artist who made the video, and he says he isn't affliated with it. The lead singer from the video -- who also wrote the rap -- is one Ryan Pann, and he confirms that he wrote it as a self-deprecating joke. Twenty-three-year-old Pann tells The Chicago Tribune, "It is hilarious because some people think [the video] is serious." He also said, "It's not a mockery of the faith, it's a mockery of the act of the Christian side hug." 

Proverbs 18:2 says, "A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion." Bring on the comments.


next: Would You Hire a Hot Nanny?
5 comments so far | Post a comment now
Selfish Mom February 16, 2010, 2:21 PM

The ability to laugh at something you hold dear is a sure sign that you’re NOT nuts. So for once you won’t hear me saying anything about crazy Christians. Not about this.

Monica February 16, 2010, 2:32 PM

I think it’s funny there are people out there who think you can’t have Jesus AND a sense of humor. Catchy rap. (But we hug from the front where I come from.)

kera February 16, 2010, 3:13 PM

This is hilarious…and kind of embarrassing. What are these people thinking? Why can’t you hug someone? So when I get to heaven do I give Jesus a side hug?? LMAO

Ash Frog February 16, 2010, 3:22 PM

lol christians

Jesus Christ February 16, 2010, 8:39 PM

Hugging people makes you go to hell if you don’t do it right people. Be careful. Here… check this out.

http://www.esoterictube.com/george-carlin-its-bad-for-ya.html


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