While I adore my teen's latest squeeze, I have to admit that I am worried about whether or not they're doing the deed.
Bruce Sallan: My 16-year-old son has had a girlfriend going on six months now, and they're going strong. She's terrific, and so is her family. She and my son seem locked at the hip; they've even managed to avoid the common mistake of "first love" by maintaining their existing friends and not drooling over each other ad nauseum.
However, they're holding hands all the time, and when I open my son's door (I knock before entering), they're often on his bed together, clearly enjoying each other's company.
Since I'm the dad to the boy in this scenario, I have to admit that my latent sexist leanings do surface. I'm less concerned about my son having sex than about him telling me (so I can vicariously relive my failed teen years). But seriously: I am concerned, and I do worry about if/when. Or has he had sex already?
My son's girlfriend's mom swears that she's talked with her daughter and there's no way they've done "it" yet. My son says the same thing. Frankly, my only worry is that they don't get emotionally hurt by having sex too soon. And since boys tend to have less emotional attachment upon having sex, I don't want my son pushing for it unless he truly cares about his girlfriend.
I think my son and his squeeze really do care for each other, and I'd like to believe that they'll wait till the time is right. I also want to believe I've taught my son the values and morals that go along with treating a woman with respect and doing the right thing. We'll see. After all, what do I know? I'm just a guy.
|Bruce Sallan gave up his showbiz career a decade ago to raise his two boys, now 13 and 16, full-time. His internationally syndicated column, A DAD'S POINT-OF-VIEW, is his take on the challenges of parenthood and male/female issues, both as a single dad and, now, as a newly remarried dad in a blended family. Join Bruce's A DAD'S POINT-OF-VIEW Facebook page at Facebook and follow him on Twitter. To contact Bruce, visit his new website brucesallan.com.|