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The Husband Trap

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If you think your husband is cheating on you, here's one good way to find out for sure. I just wish I had thought of it myself.

Two women using computer

Flying Solo with Two Carry-Ons: I was out shopping with a very dear friend, "Carrie." As we were searching through the racks of clothes, she asked me if I would do her favor. "Of course," I said. She then asked me to help her create a fake Facebook account. She explained that she wanted to know once and for all if her husband would cheat on her. She said she had suspected infidelity for a while -- ever since she found out that her husband had befriended several young women on Facebook. Although I thought her fake-Facebook idea was brilliant, I told her to be very careful because she may not like what she finds out. This had the potential to go very wrong. But she was adamant: She wanted to do it.

The next day, I went to her house and we began to "create" the perfect girl. We named her Jessica, found a picture of a cute blonde in a bikini and sent out a mass request to random people to befriend her. Finally, we sent out a friend request to Carrie's husband, "Tim": "Hi Tim, I don't know if you remember me, but I was an intern at your firm three years ago. You're looking pretty good. I hope all is well. Jessica."

We hit "Send Request" and waited. Less than an hour later, we got a reply: "Oh yeah, of course I remember you! How are you? What are you up to?"

Wow! We couldn't believe it. He actually said he remembered her. Needless to say, Carrie was pissed off.

Jessica and Tim began chatting every few days. The days turned into weeks. He never -- not once! -- mentioned his wife or kids. Plus he had no pictures of them on his Facebook page. The chatting started becoming very flirtatious, which then turned into sexual innuendos and finally led to Tim asking Jessica out for drinks.

It was all I could do to contain Carrie's rage. Should she continue with this or stop? Carrie decided she had to go all the way.

Jessica agreed to meet Tim for drinks. On the day of meeting, Carrie panicked. She wanted to give Tim an opportunity for an easy out. She called him and asked him out on a "date night" because their babysitter was available. But Tim told her he had an important meeting with the president of his company and wouldn't be able to miss it.

So we continued with the plan. The meeting was set for 7 p.m. I was the backup. At 7:10, I went into the restaurant to check out whether or not Tim was there. There he was, sitting at the bar. I sent Carrie a text with the go ahead.

Carrie walked up to Tim, gave him a kiss on the cheek and sat down on the bar stool next to him. You could see the panic in Tim's eyes. Looking around the room, Tim asked Carrie what she was doing there. Carrie told him Jessica had told her they were meeting for drinks -- so she thought she'd join them.

Tim was clearly freaking out and trying to cover up why he was there. Suddenly, Carrie ripped into him and told him that she was Jessica.

Then, well ... let's just say the people in the restaurant got dinner and a show that night.

Tim gave her the "we're just friends having drinks" speech, the "I didn't do anything!" speech and the always awesome "I would NEVER cheat on you" speech.

But Carrie couldn't get past the chats filled with sexual overtones, the fact that he lied to her about having a meeting and his willingness to meet this girl for drinks.

They tried to work it out, but Carrie just didn't trust him anymore. She never really had, obviously. This, plus other issues they've had during their 13-year marriage, has led them to seriously talk about divorce.

Facebook has done great things by reconnecting family and friends. I just didn't know it was a good spy tool too.

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25 comments so far | Post a comment now
Lisa R. February 11, 2010, 12:45 PM

Wow, those first responses shocked me. The number of people who sided w/the husband on this & called the wife any kind of nasty name for what she did is unbelievable! Like the Anonymous post from 2/11 said, if you ask your husband/wife if he/she is cheating, would you expect an honest answer? Cheaters lie; those two things go hand-in-hand. And to Vincent who actually wrote, “He met a girl for drinks. He flirted. Nothing wrong with either of those things”… Are you freaking kidding me?? If a married person meets someone of the opposite sex for drinks without telling their spouse—especially someone they don’t even know, just met on the internet—that’s a form of cheating itself. No, they didn’t have sex or even kiss, but that’s what that man was hoping for when he agreed to meet her for drinks—and then LIED TO HIS WIFE when she gave him a chance to redeem himself. I hope you’re not married, Vincent, and if you are, my sympathies to your wife.

Simone February 11, 2010, 1:33 PM

Seems to me that this wife had good reasons to doubt her husband’s fidelity. It’s interesting that so many of you would rather not know the truth about his ability to be faithful. She even gave him an opportunity to go out with her instead of cheating with Jessica…we see how that went. I wonder what would have happend if she did not do the sting operation…Can you say Gov. Sanford, Tiger Woods, John Edwards, Kobe Bryant, etc. Ignorance of the truth does not make things go away.

Vanessa February 11, 2010, 10:56 PM

I’m just laughing at all the people accusing the woman of using this tool to test **HER** husband’s fidelity.

Oh yes, let her doubt her spouse and be married to a cheater because it’s disrespectful to *him*. Jeez, can’t she just let her husband cheat in peace.

Black Iris February 18, 2010, 4:59 PM

This is insane. Creating a character to seduce your husband? You don’t lead someone into doing something wrong and then get mad at him.

How can she complain about trust when she lies herself?

Why didn’t she talk to her husband about his Facebook page and ask him to put her on it?

Lindsay October 28, 2010, 4:13 AM

I personally don’t think there’s anything wrong with this. If I SUSPECTED that my husband/significant other was cheating, I would want to test him like that to see for sure. I wouldn’t do something like that for no reason though. If I suspect that something is up due to HIS ACTIONS, I would check it out. He was obviously cheating, and it’s good that she found that out so they can go their own ways. Atleast maybe they’ll be happier now. I would say the same thing for a man suspecting that his woman is cheating. Cheaters deserve to be caught.

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