Romantic misfires roundup.
Love means never having to say you're sorry -- if you refrain from giving any of these crummy Valentine's Day gifts, that is.
10 Worst Ways to Say I Love You
Husband / Wife Arm Pillow
Here's a gift that says to your partner, "Yes, I love you, but I prefer to spend my nights elsewhere."
Avaliable at: probargainhunter
As embarrassed as you are to wear those glow-in-the-dark pasties and G-string gift set from your guy, imagine how HE feels being guilted into trying on these "wear your heart on his crotch" boxers.
Available at: wacky planet.
Box o' Wine
A box of wine, a loaf of bread and thou ...
Yep, nothing says "classy" like a cardboard box filled with vino. If you really want to make an impression, serve in mismatched coffee mugs!
But take heed:
Giving your partner a heart on Valentine's Day is sweet ... giving them a HEART ATTACK, not so nice.
Never, ever, think of playing or singing this song to your beloved on Valentine's Day. Ever. Muskrat Love is hands down the winner of the most sappy, cheesy, nauseating, cloying and syrupy love song of all time. Don't take our word for it -- we dare you to make it through the whole video!
If you're going to get a tattoo in honor of your love-- get a real one -- at least a true tat doesn't make a huge, sticky mess.
Available at: guiltfunromanitcgifts
A Teddy Bear Holding a Heart
Taking someone for granted has never been so easy!
Roses Made out of Underwear
Buying roses is oh so very thoughtful. Some nice, tastefully naughty lingerie makes a nice gift, too ... but combining them? NOT COOL.
Available at: dhgate
There's so, so much wrong with giving this coital instruction manual for a V-Day gift. To start, calling your Valentine a "dummy" isn't likely to get anybody in "the mood" (unless you're into that kind of thing) and neither is having Dr. Ruth Westheimer's voyeuristic mug on the cover.
Available at: Amazon
8' Teddy Bear
Bring this thing into bed with you and you'll be sleeping on the couch! This montrosity will set you back 539 bucks.