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Jake and Vienna Get My Rose!

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I think he definitely made the right call.

Jake and Vienna

Elizabeth Lindell: I am one of the few who believe that Jake made the right choice on the finale of "The Bachelor" Monday night.

I did not marry my best friend; I married my lover and the love of my life. He did not become my best friend until years later. I, like Jake, made a decision based on passion -- and nearly twelve years later, that fire is still going strong.

The "heat" that Jake says he has with Vienna -- which he says he's never felt in any other relationship -- isn't something you can build. It's either there, or it isn't. But friendship can develop. The bond of marriage strengthens as each year passes and emotional intimacy deepens, but if there was no passion to begin with, it's not going to be there later.

I identified with Vienna when she said that she felt like she was taking a leap of faith, and that marriage is like jumping off a cliff. I'd thought those exact words the night before my wedding. But there is a knowing and a peace about understanding that you have a lifetime to discover the people you are -- and the people you will become. That's what a marriage is. I have several best friends, but only one soulmate.

I wish more young couples decided to get married based on how their hearts guided them. I believe that making safe choices -- without passionate connections -- are what lead to divorce and lifeless marriages.


46 comments so far | Post a comment now
Anonymous March 3, 2010, 12:16 PM

Jake and Vienna, will be happy they are in love.I am glad Jake choose Vienna.You can see that love each other.

Lucy March 3, 2010, 1:46 PM

I completely agree! I married my best friend. And 13 years later, we are now in a sexless marriage (that has been a problem for 8 years). I feel like we are friends, but nothing more. There are days that I wish I had married the guy that couldn’t get enough of me and that I couldn’t get enough of.

Allie March 3, 2010, 2:06 PM

I agree! I am so happy for Jake and Vienna. They have each others’ heart. You can see the love and passion in their eyes. I also wished that I would have married the guy that could not get enough of me and I could not get enough of him. Friendship is fine but if you really have passion for someone it doesn’t fade.

miley March 5, 2010, 4:38 PM

I think Vienna is a wonderful girl. Ever since I started watching this show I could tell she would be the perfect choice for him because if you go back and watch this show you can just tell how comfortable and REAL Jake was when he was with Vienna. But if you see him with other girls you can tell he was kind of forcing himself to be with them. He was very fake with other women.

sapphire April 12, 2010, 2:17 PM

noway vienna you will not have my man

geena April 16, 2010, 10:20 AM

I Married The Man I love not The man My parents wants .aND iM S HAPPY,FOR 20 YEARS OF MARRIAGE OUR PASSION WITH EACH OTHER GETTING MORE STRONGER. i aGREE WITH YOU !! jAKE DID THGE RIGHT CHOICE AND vIENNA dID HER BEST TO FIND THE RIGHT MAN . gOOD LUCK

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