It seems we will be judged no matter what we do. I have always worked full time and felt guilty for someone else “raising” my child (as someone put it). I am on mat. leave now, and would love to stay home once mat. leave is over. We will see how the budget works.
I say we all make our own choices that suit our families needs and leave other people’s choices to them.

I know I have made the right choice. It’s been difficult at times, and, like you, members of my extended family sometimes don’t understand.

But my youngest leaves for college in less than four months and I have no regrets. Whatever career highlights I missed are eclipsed by the sound of her car pulling in the driveway each afternoon after school. Or a lazy summer day when we goof off - together. Or the times when she is sick and I can be there for her without having to evaluate what else is on my plate that day.

For some, when the kids enter high school is a cue to get back into the workforce; for me, it was the best time to be home.

YMMV -

Im a SAHM too. We were going to put our son in daycare but then after he was born I couldn’t do it.
My husband and I decided that It would be best for me to stay home and raise our son. Financially it would be a little tight but we’ve made it 3 years with me home!
I’ve had people ask me when I want to go back to work. I just tell them I like what Im doing right now, that maybe when our kids are in school I’d consider it.

Im never going to apologize for being a SAHM. Some of my family and friends are jealous and wish they could do the same thing.

I’m a mother of two kids, ages 4 and 2, and I work from home. Whenever I’m working, my kids crave my attention. They are young so they don’t quite understand what I’m doing and they feel ignored. When I’m playing with them, my mind isn’t fully there and I’m constantly going over the mile long to-do list in my head. It’s a constant struggle between parenting, working, and household chores and I feel like I come up short in every area.

I really enjoy staying at home with my kids, but I do feel the guilt that this author is talking about. I have a college degree and a teaching cred. but there is no where I would rather be than raising my own kids….craziness and all. :-)

i think that as long as you are raising your children to be good people that you are contributing to the world and that you definitely shouldn’t apologize for it. be happy in your little corner of the universe no matter what you do.

I can totally relate to this. I am a single mother with two master’s degrees and will soon be pursuing a Doctorate. I have an 8 year old daughter, and I have worked full time while going to school and raising her. So when I became pregnant with my son, I made the decision not to return to work, to focus on my kids. I have heard it all. Everyone wants to know why I would quit a job as a single mother of two during a recession. I often found myself telling people that I was focusing on school, but this was only partially true. This is what I have told people to justify my decision to be with my children. I no longer make excuses. It’s silly that sahm arent valued and supported. That just shows the moral direction in which our country is headed. Everyone has to do what works best for them without the guilt.

I do NOT for the life of me understand the “wasting your degree” comments that seem to be tossed at mothers (not parents, just mothers) lately. Studies have shown that an educated mother is tremendously beneficial to children. So whether you are working outside of the home or within it, those years of education are being put to good use!

You don’t need to apologize. Just appreciate that you are in such a good financial position and don’t rub in the faces of those who aren’t. My only complaint about SAHMs I know is how they try to tell me if I made sacrifices maybe I could afford to stay home. Well considering all the SAHMs I know go on vacations, get mani/pedis and professional dye jobs, go clothes shopping for themselves and their kids at least once per month and myriad of other things my husband and I can’t afford to do with both of us working full time it’s infuriating. What it comes down to is money - either one of you makes enough to support a family or you both work.

I’ve been a SAHM almost the entire time I’ve been a mommy, and I love it. I’ve had to work a few times and I enjoyed it, but I really enjoy being able to stay at home with my children and be a part of their growth process.

I’ve had other mothers assume I’m uneducated or stupid because I don’t have a job. No, that’s not it. I don’t have a college degree (even though I do plan on going to college to get a degree in the field of my choice), but I’m certainly not uneducated or stupid. i am extremely computer literate and know I can find a good job quickly. Staying at home is a choice my husband and I made and it works for us. I’m entirely grateful to have this opportunity because I know alot of mothers/families don’t. Even if I did work full time, any money I earn would go straight to daycare so there’s really no point in working full time right now.

For the past year, I have had a very part-time job at the church nursery during church hours. It’s a wonderful opportunity to share God with my family and I enjoy it very much.

I’m very blessed to have a wonderful job as a SAHM mother! And if anybody doesn’t like it, they can kiss my a$$!