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My 12-Year-Old Had Her First Kiss

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Kate Meyers: My youngest daughter, age 12, got her first kiss last week. Though she was excited by the thought, I got the sense that the delivery lacked Hollywood-style punch. "It gets better after the third time," her seventh-grade friend (obviously a kissing veteran) counseled.

Girl blowing a kiss

I loved that my daughter told me, and that she felt it was between us gals. "Don't tell dad," she warned. "I don't think he could handle it."

Her sixth-grade suitor (whose name shall be protected to save the not-so-innocent), has been pursuing, texting and attempting to make weekend plans with her since early fall.

Many moms look at me and say, "Emmy has a BOYFRIEND. Are you worried about that?" To which I laugh and offer up the observation from Emmy's big sister Annie, who is 15 and knows all: "We don't need to worry about Emmy's boyfriends until they weigh more than 80 pounds," she said.

My daughter is still innocent. She's not hoping for a regular kissing routine. And frankly, between soccer, track, homework, girlfriends and her Hebrew studies, she doesn't have the time. I actually think she's got more balance and wisdom than a lot of women I know, including (sometimes) her mother. She loves her life, she participates in activities that bring her joy, she enjoys her girlfriends and she occasionally gets a bit gobsmacked over the attentions of a young gentleman who walks her to class and is seemingly mad about her charms.

I think it sets up nicely for a healthy future in girl/boy relationships -- and sweet smooching for years to come.

next: Woody Allen, The Moral Authority on Child Rape
33 comments so far | Post a comment now
Anonymous November 21, 2010, 10:29 PM

You people are ignorant if you think that young age affection and relationships will lead to under aged sex! They have no connection! Your daughters actions are predicated by her choices, not her age. Wow.

Anonymous December 5, 2010, 10:11 AM

i am 14 now and had my first kiss at 13. ive been really educated about sex and all that and have no intention to go anywhere close. my boyfriend and i are still dating and all weve done is kiss and a little making out but its pretty innocent. i think its great that your daughter told you (i didnt tell my mom) and you guys have a great relationship and you should trust her

camila February 17, 2011, 2:55 PM

Oh!come on, i dont want to sound ofenssive but the girl is 12 is in age where they start liking boys and stuff, its very normal having a first kiss by that age. I had mine at age 11 and im now 20 and never had sex. I know that almost all of you guys had their first kiss at that age.

Jacob February 25, 2011, 10:59 PM

you people should calm the Fwak down. i had my first kiss at 11 (and first naked experience with my girlfriend Not touching because i was in the middle of moving so we didn’t have time.. damn) on my birthday. so what?

How to Get My Girlfriend Back March 14, 2011, 2:42 AM

Would you compose a couple of content articles for me. Your penning method is definitely remarkable.

Anonymous March 15, 2011, 4:40 PM

My friend is in 6 grade and she had her first kiss when she was 9 or 10 and she had kissed a loot of boys right now she has a boyfriend and she is 10 she is too young for that

13 year old March 21, 2011, 8:22 PM

I just turned 13 and a few kids in my grades kiss… I want to but i told my mom about the other kids and she got really protected and freaked and stuff… My dad is 10x worse and he dosnt know… I really want to but my relashionship with my mom might be bad b/caz she told me not too

Anonymous March 31, 2011, 9:11 PM

i think it is cool i mean alot of people say your too young or it’s just puppy love i think that it is awsome yes it is a little young but as long if they don’t make out or have sex it is fine hugging,kissing,kissing on the cheek is ok fyi if anyone has a daunter that is wanting a boyfriend listen up make sure that the boy is sweet gentle and shy they won’t break a girls heart and they won’t try anything until they can i am 11 and i speak like an adult i hope this helped ^_^

chris  April 6, 2011, 2:07 PM

12 year old first kiss????? My first kiss was at 7yr’s old.

dont be a blind mom May 16, 2011, 9:30 AM

Do not be a blind mother. If your daugther is as busy as you say she is, she would be receiving Dopamine (feel good brain neurotransmitter) from those acitvities and not be obtaining Dopamine from kissing. Further if you think kissing is all about “Hollywood”, get a life those are movies, not real life and in real life leads to what our bodies are designed to do is to procreate. Also obviously your daughter does not seem that busy, and sounds like you opened a can of worms at this point, congratulations as she will be boy crazy and kissing and soft petting by 13, and if you are lucky she will not get pregnant by 13-14 and only sexually active by 13. But teen pregnancy will come soon enough. Then who will you blame? Let me show you who to blame…THE ADULT…LOOK IN THE MIRROR. I am sure you do nto want this, but this activities will INCREASE THAT RISK. The point is it is not all your fault that you feel this way, but learn to be a mature well-informed adult by understanding where this can lead. While your daughter has already experienced the kiss, try not to focus on this but instead give her encouragement in other activities.

Concerned Mother May 19, 2011, 10:25 AM

I can appreciate that your daughter can confide with you about a kiss and how exciting it is that she is growing up, but one single kiss can lead to other things. My 13 year old daughter and I are pretty close and she just recently had her first kiss a few months ago and boy was I blind sided by some of the other things that I found out she was doing. I like to think that I raised a morally sound child, but with raging hormones,how is a mother suppose to compete?!?! I hate to be “that” nosy mom and read some of her messages on her phone or through email, but knowing is priceless! Since this has been a very stressful and turbulant time for me any suggestions would be very helpful at this time. I’ve heard that there is a site that filters obscene language and was just wondering if anyone else has been on this site?

Marv May 21, 2011, 10:50 AM

YMMD with that awnser! TX

Dahrann May 22, 2011, 8:37 AM

Thakns for sharing. What a pleasure to read!

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