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Help! My Daughter Wants to Be in Pageants

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Guest blogger Chloe:The other day, my 6-year-old daughter saw a commercial for "Toddlers & Tiaras" and said she wanted to be in beauty pageants. HELP!

toddlers and tiaras

There is no way I would ever want to subject my daughter to something like that. Watching those pageant moms turns my stomach. And there's something just creepy about seeing a 6-year-old in false eyelashes and pancake makeup.

Yet, my daughter is very girly and loves dressing up. I'm sure for her it would be a dream come true to be in a beauty pageant.

If your daughter really wanted to be in a pageant, would you let her do it once? Or am I right to just say no?

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30 comments so far | Post a comment now
Jennifer July 14, 2010, 1:03 PM

There are other types of pageants that aren’t freaky like the ones on TV. Check locally and do a search for natural pageants.

Sara July 14, 2010, 5:14 PM

Take her to dance class. She gets to wear costumes and look pretty like a princess on stage.

dmill July 15, 2010, 7:43 AM

My daughter wanted to do a pageant when she was 6. Luckily our county fair had a natural beauty pageant. Also, luckily, it was a disaster from the beginning because it was so poorly managed. They moved my daughter up to the 7-11 yr old group when we got there (I’m still not sure why) which meant she had a different question from the one we rehearsed. They forgot to add her name to the list of kids in that age group and therefore she wasn’t called until I pointed out she hadn’t gone. It is August in the south and no contingency plans were made for an evening rainstorm so all the kids had to crowd under one tent while the parents got soaked. To top it all off, the organizer’s daughter won her age group even though it clearly should have gone to another girl who did fantastic. That put my daughter off pageants for good! Thank goodness!
Now she’s 9 and does dance and participates in theater when she can and that satifies her need to perform.

Melissa July 18, 2010, 6:21 AM

Yes, let her do it! I think kids learn from experience. Don’t want them to have their heart ripped out and stomped on. It is normal for every little girl to dress up like a princess and look glam. Unfortunately pageants have gone OFF THE CHARTS with spray tans, diets, and false eyelashes.
I have a little girl and she just turned one. We live in Hong Kong - a friend of ours asked us to send her photo in for a commercial. Ok, cute. They replied - she is too exotic for the Asian market. Uhmm, excuse me, exotic? She is a baby. Babies are cute.
I think she is the most beautiful little girl on the planet but I am her mother and I am the only one that should think that!

Katie's Mom August 20, 2010, 10:38 AM

Go to you your local Salvation Army store and buy a bunch of glitzy/frilly/dramatic clothes (or get donations from relatives - everyone has bridesmaids or prom dresses sitting in their closets. Buy some cheap makeup from Walmart. Let her invite a bunch of friends over and play at being in a pageant/being princesses/being grown-ups. There’s no need to take it on the road. With a little bit of imagination and very little money you can give your daughter the opportunity to indulge her desire for the glittery and the girly AND enter into dramatic and imaginative play.
You also get the opportunity to take lots of photos that you can use for blackmail purposes as she gets older 8^) (Just joking, but I have a bunch of “how not to dress” pictures from when my girls were small and loved their “dress-up box.”)
If she really wants the opportunity to perform, then I agree with the person who suggested dance classes and theater/drama groups. These activities require skills and also teach about team work rather than focusing on approving unreal, oversexualized, and stereotypical images of women.

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valium December 1, 2010, 2:47 PM

What did you do, just say whatever it is you wanted to make people mad?! You cant just say something like that and not give any backup for it! Youve got to at least give me a reason to think that you know what youre talking about, otherwise, you just sound like some kid with a grudge!

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