Liz Fenton: I've always thought I had relatively well-behaved kids. They say please and thank you when prompted, and even eat a vegetable here and there. But even I know that being trapped in the confined space of an airplane for four hours can turn any angel child under 6 into the devil's spawn.
That's why I spent countless hours packing before jumping on our four-hour flight to the Midwest with the kids. And no, I wasn't fretting over what would look best as I sweated my ass off at the zoo (WTH is up with all the humidity?!) or remembering to pack bug spray so my California ass didn't get eaten alive by mosquitoes. Rather, I was attempting to become a walking entertainment center/convenience store.
Hungry? No problem! I've got every snack you've ever shown any interest in stuffed inside my bag.
Bored? Um, didn't you see Daddy lugging around that man purse? Inside is the DVD player and every movie or TV show that has held your focus for more than twenty minutes. And you don't know it yet, but Mommy's going to let you watch it until your eyes fall out if it means you'll keep quiet on the flight.
Too good for "Scooby-Doo"? No worries! I've also broken the bank downloading SpongeBob apps on my iTouch. It's fine! I didn't want to relax and listen to music anyway. In fact, the sound of that screaming baby and the woman crunching those homemade graham-cracker sandwiches is quite soothing after a while.
Concerned that our plane has been turned back to the gate for "safety reasons"? It's all good. The only thing that I'm concerned about is how much battery life is left on the DVD player. And when we get there and I discover my hubby left the charger at home? Well, that's a whole other blog ....