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WTH Is Up with Your Facebook Status?

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Michelle Kemper Brownlow: We all waste time on Facebook. But this week, I found myself screaming "WTH?!" at my screen when I caught a glimpse of what some of my own Facebook friends were sharing with the world!


There were the people who just wanted to make others jealous:
"Back in the saddle again! Working on two final core projects for the new book."
"Breakfast in Boston, lunch in L.A., dinner in Hawaii."

The people who needed to spend less time in front of the computer/TV:
"Is it Thursday yet?"
"Pursuant to Starfleet General Order 104, section A, you are deemed unfit and I hereby relieve you from your command."
"Sooo loving this Jake and Vienna interview ... it's such a trainwreck, and I can't stop watching and laughing!!"

The people who just need someone to talk to:
"I'm wondering: What's the dumbest thing you've ever done?"
"What are YOU doing right NOW?"
"Talk to me!"

The people who need daily (sometimes hourly) reassurance:
"OK, so I have no communication whatsoever w/ my son, who is on a glacier or a volcano somewhere in Iceland."
"I feel like a failure to my family."

The people who share helpful tips:
"Marriage lesson: When you're sleeping face-to-face with your wife and you sneeze on her ... even though accidental and involuntary ... it is NOT funny."
"Never fart in the spray-tanning stall ... I almost died!"

The people who give TMI:
"Now dinner, then shower/bath, then bed!"
"Today, I actually laughed until I peed!"
"NEVER eat a dozen prunes in an hour ... I can't get out of the bathroom!"

The people who, well, I just don't know...:
"Jing, joing jadda sing see!"
"He's got sherpes!"
"I am no longer to be known as Mr., Jesse or even Daddy. Henceforth, I am to be known as ... 'Chickenburp.'"

Whatever did we do before we could broadcast every second of our lives to hundreds of people simultaneously? Thanks, Facebook!

next: Divorce Dialogues: 'I Hope I'm a Better Dad Now'
7 comments so far | Post a comment now
Pamala July 7, 2010, 7:50 AM

One doesn’t need to actually be watching Star Trek to quote it. =-)

Anonymous July 7, 2010, 8:39 AM

Did you have permission to plagiarise other people’s material?

Where did you list the sources?

Can I copy and paste this on my website without saying where it came from or would I be a thief for doing so?

Lisa R. July 7, 2010, 8:57 AM

Wow, seriously, Anonymous?? THAT is your response to the article? She’s right: People do spend too much time & share too much information on FB. The article hasn’t been submitted for a Pulitzer & she didn’t name names, she just quoted what various unnamed “people” wrote on their walls. Relax a little. Life is too short. Believe me, I know.

Kathy July 7, 2010, 11:48 AM

Sounds more like people just having fun. I have basically fallen under each of those categories. Facebook is just a FUN outlet for me. I have often posted “There is always the remove as friend option.” as my status for the people who whine about not “getting” my humor.

Colleen July 7, 2010, 2:33 PM

If you really don’t like someone’s FB status because you’re a snob, then ‘unfriend’ them - they’re better off without you.

Michelle Kemper Brownlow July 8, 2010, 4:16 AM

That wasn’ intended to get you all fired up!

margie July 12, 2010, 11:17 AM

lol, too funny and SO true.

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