Is "Un-Divorced" the New Marriage?


I actually dated an Un-divorced for 3 weeks tops. Apparently they were seperated. He moved back with his parents and she stayed at thier house. He told me he she had gotten pregnant with their only child after only dating a couple weeks and he had to marry her because of the child and nothing more. When I asked why he has divorced her he says she refuses to get a divorce because she has hopes for a reconciliation. Anyways, last I heard he moved back with his wife and he’s dating ANOTHER girl that she found out about. Glad I got out of that short-lived relationship when I did.
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This is a great post. I personally know two men in this type of situation. In one instance, the man is taking care of the majority of the wife’s expenses and caring for his two kids by her. He still has some belongings at “their” home in a safe with his reasoning being he had it custom built and installed, and it can’t be moved and is too big for his apartment. His wife wants them to get back together. He’s not interested and has had other relationships. His reasoning is the expense of divorce and it works the way it is.
The other man’s wife also wants to be with him, but he is still “sowing his wild oats” with a lot of women. They supposedly decided that it would be a separation until and if he was ready to settle down and be with her exclusively. He says he loves her and she’s a wonderful woman and whatnot, but he’s not ready for being tied down… or something like that. And, you’re right, it keeps him from being able to fully commit to other women. I asked him if he tells women he’s married and they normally don’t care because they think he will divorce his wife for them. HA! He also takes care of some of his wife’s expenses.
The first wife wasn’t seeing other people and I’m not sure about the second wife.
I don’t know many people, but I know two situations like this so I’m sure there are bound to be many many more. I was separated for more than two years before we divorced and I really didn’t care one way or the other. I just didn’t want to deal with the situation any longer. But to be un-divorced forever… uh, no! Unfortunately, I guess I’m not “good enough” for my expenses to be handled by someone I was married to.
(LOL… love the end of the post.)