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SAHM Wants to Get a 9-to-5 Job ... Or Does She?!

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Michelle Kemper Brownlow:I was taking a walk after dinner with my 5-year-old, and he started noticing the different numbers of cars in our neighbors' driveways. Our conversation led to a short chat about how some mommies work, and how sometimes it's even the daddies who stay home with the kids."I want Daddy to stay home and you go to work ... all night long!" he said.

woman daydreaming
At first, I was hurt. I'm better at letting him play at bath time, and I can do a killer Skippyjon Jones read-aloud. Why would he want ME to go to work? As we walked, I started to let this sink in. My schedule would be cake! Get up, shower (Holy crap! I'd get a shower every day!) and walk out the door (no packing lunches, no last-minute homework help) to a quiet car ... uh, a quiet car?!

Luckily, my little guy hopped out of the stroller and was checking out a bug, because I don't think I could have walked any further. My brain was trying to wrap itself around this AMAZING secret my husband of seventeen years had been keeping from me: He's got it made!

The bug went on his way, so we continued on ours. All right, so my husband gets to work. Some meetings, some employee issues (it's not like I don't do those two things every day, too -- and I bet his employees don't spit at him) and then lunch with the coworkers. Another bug, and I stop to daydream. Whole days with adults and conversation that doesn't include a bodily function as its focus! That would be better than the spa!

We round the bend as my secret-keeping husband rides by on the mower -- a vehicle so loud that you can't hear the shrieks from two tweens fighting for bathroom rights. I AM SOLD! Sign me up! He turns off the mower to greet our little man, and I ask if the other kids are inside. "No," he says. "Some guy just stopped by and asked them if they would help him look for his lost puppy. They went that way."

Forget it. He'd never keep them all alive.

next: 11-Year-Old Dies from Asthma Attack
33 comments so far | Post a comment now
Mo September 2, 2010, 5:29 AM

Your 5 yr old rides in a stroller? And spits at you??

Anonymous September 2, 2010, 6:05 AM

First of all why are you still working - 5 year olds are in kindergarten all day (or should be) so WHAT are you doing? And agree w/other poster -why on earth would your 5 year old spit at you or have a stroller.
And who are you married to that isn’t helping out?

I laugh at your idea of a working mom shcedule - just jumping up and taking a shower be off for the day-hahahaha. Wake up sweetie - working moms are up around 4:30/5 am to get showered THEN get the kids ready, do last minute homework pack lunches make their lunches,dropkids at school & pre-school, run to work, work straight through to lunch (all those little “coffee breaks” and “lunches” you are dreaming about don’t exist) and then either work through lunch or run errands during lunch or visit the preschool, rush back to work, pick up kids from the preschool, hang out witht the kids, cook, clean, MAYBE after 10pm have time to have that adult conversation with their husband and start all over the next morning. So while you’re strolling your FIVE year old and having time to daydream why don’t think of what it’s really like for a working mom!

Jessica September 2, 2010, 7:57 AM

Completely agree with the first 2 comments. I wish I hopped out of bed every morning and enjoyed a shower. Most days I shower at night to save time in the morning. My mornings consist getting myself ready,my 2 year old and newborn ready to go to daycare,making breakfast and getting everyone fed, fighting morning traffic, getting them both into daycare, and then making a mad dash to get to work on time. Lunch—usually pack a lunch and work through it or run errands, by the time I get off work, pick up my LO’s and get home its almost 6. Then its dinner, clean up, baths and bed. My husband usually gets home between clean up and bath.. A working moms life is not nearly as glamourous as you invision it!

Laila September 2, 2010, 10:12 AM

This is clearly written by a woman who has NEVER worked a day in her life!!

Agree with all the other posters -well said ladies!!

Anonymous September 2, 2010, 10:37 AM

Maybe we should be getting mad at dads, not at-home moms. Dads are the ones who should be doing something if a mom has to get up at 4:30 or skip her shower before work.

I agree with the blogger, working parents with an at-home parent have it made. They really do get to walk out the door to a quiet car and adult co-workers. Their days aren’t crammed with extra errands and they get 8 hours of sleep at night.

If it makes the author feel any better, her son wanted her to work at night. It sounds like he wants everyone at home with him. :-)

Beth September 2, 2010, 11:12 AM

Uh…cake schedule? yeah, nice try. You get up at 5am or before so you can hurry to get a shower before anyone else gets up. After your ready, or sometimes during getting ready, you still have to attend to the kids…make lunches, finish laundry, etc…my work begins at 8am, so if you’re lucky, the CVS will be open before that so you can grab the stuff you forgot while rushing through your stop on the way home yesterday. You’re up for 3-4 hours, and then you start “work” and you don’t stop until everyone is back in bed that night. Agreed with the above…not so glamorous. And by the way, don’t think that you can avoid conversations about bodily functions at work…boys are still boys, even when they are men.

The grass is pretty much the same shade of green on both sides…most of the time.

Carrie September 2, 2010, 12:26 PM

Clearly anonymous is a sahm “Dads are the ones who should be doing something if a mom has to get up at 4:30 or skip her shower before work.”
Wake up, hon - the dads ARE doing something, it’s just when you have an actual job that’s what it takes to make it work. NO ONE - mom or dad - just wakes and showers and strolls off to work and that’s that.

Also anonymous OBVIOUSLY meant the SAHM’s days aren’t crammed with extra errans - only those of us who work know how that feels!! Psst, anonymous, when you’re staying home runnings errands is your job! Shocking I kknow that you have to do more than play with the kids and daydream and go out for lunches when you stay home, but you have no idea what it’s like to work!!

Anonymous September 2, 2010, 1:30 PM

@Carrie - Actually, I meant that a person married to a stay-at-home-parent doesn’t have extra errands. For them, going to work is like the blogger’s daydream.

SAHM September 2, 2010, 1:36 PM

Modern at-home moms are not like moms from the 1950s. We have all held down jobs. We remember what it is like to work in an office. Most of us will work for money again some day. Many of us do part-time work or work at home.

Michelle Kemper Brownlow September 2, 2010, 2:42 PM

First of all to the judgemental commenters…my son is SPECIAL NEEDS so, YES he needs a stroller and YES, he spits! Please realize there are many different children in the world…not only PERFECT ones like yours.

Secondly, this post was in jest! And it was written based on MY HUSBAND’S schedule and what HE does. Now from a mom’s point of view. I am the FIRST person to tell you that I am a SAHM b/c I could NEVER keep up with the schedule a working mom need sto have. Could NEVER do it. Working moms are to be commended…I raise my glass (or sippy cup) to you because I could never do it.

Let’s play nice here…no nastiness! Sheesh!

XXXX September 2, 2010, 3:18 PM

What’s that big cow doing in a stroller?

Tish September 2, 2010, 5:34 PM

Seems like a lot of working moms here have a huge chip on their shoulder and have forgotten how to laugh. I found the original post quite funny. All mother’s know, working or “not”, the ups and downs, and the good, bad and ugly, and it’s a well rounded mother who can laugh at the imperfections in motherhood and in all of us. I find the majority of these comments rude and rather cruel, and I conclude that those working moms writing with such lack of respect, have chosen the best path for their own children by putting them in a daycare situation, because I can only pray that they are being raised by a more compassionate person than those posting.

Melissa September 2, 2010, 5:54 PM

Wow. I can’t believe that XXXX continued to refer to Michelle’s son as a “big cow,” especially after it was posted that he was special needs. I’m a full-time working Mom myself and did not take any offense to Michelle’s post - it was obviously written in jest! I have never seen such rude comments on a blog before. You ladies should be absolutely ashamed of yourself and begin to think of the example you want to set for your children.

weezy September 2, 2010, 7:01 PM

I have often thought to myself that I cannot imagine being a working Mom. I too, do not know how you do it. Having said that, I am so glad at this moment that I am not, because it seems to make the majority of you angry, nasty, insensitive, ugly women. Shame, shame, shame. I would hope it is difficult to look at yourselves in the mirror tomorrow a.m. while you are getting ready for work.

Mo September 2, 2010, 7:43 PM

I apologize for my rudeness…however, if you’re going to state that your 5 yr old rides in a stroller and spits please /mention/ that he has special needs. That’s not the kind of thing most people assume.

Single Mom September 2, 2010, 8:23 PM

YIKES! Who are the ones with the real issues here? Sounds like there are ton of bitter women out there. First and foremost, XXXX, how does any mother call anyone’s child a cow? You are a scary person with serious issues. Kharma can be powerful - if I were you, I would be doing some charity work to make up for that comment. You never know what your child may present YOU with. And MO why should any parent have to explain that they have a special needs child? Don’t be so judgemental. Do you realize how ridiculous YOU sound demanding an explanation so that you don’t judge unfairly? Take some ownership for your words.

I am a SINGLE mother (my kids father is no way involved in their lives), that works out of the home (all mothers work) and has a special needs child. I hit a trifecta and I in NO way found Michelle’s article offensive what-so-ever. It was in jest. It was a bust on her husband and his day. Period. Lighten up, women! We are all in this together! A little sisterhood, please!

ag September 2, 2010, 8:28 PM

@ Mo Just goes to show you that you shouldn’t ASSUME things about another persons life. Why must the mommy wars continue? Both SAHM and working moms face unique challenges due to their circumstances. Can’t we all just get along?

mountainmommy September 2, 2010, 9:53 PM

wow, there are some RESENTFUL angry women out there. yikes. I am a SAHM and I work my butt off, and I LOVE it and I am LUCKY and BLESSED enough to get to hang out with my kiddos. My husband works his butt off too, and guess what? He does get to get up, take a shower, and go to work in a quiet car. but I dont resent him. the blog was funny, the comments mostly just cruel but they certainly make me feel blessed to have the life that I do and remind me to thank god for it.

Anonymous September 3, 2010, 5:32 AM

” because it seems to make the majority of you angry, nasty, insensitive, ugly women”

And we can see by Weezy’s statement that most SAHMs are arrogant, judgemental and self-righteous

Tish September 3, 2010, 10:58 AM

oh come on, special needs or not, if a five year old wants to ride in a stroller for their after dinner walk, what’s the big deal? Who are you to judge? Heck, I’d love for someone to give me a ride in a stroller, do they make them my size? And what kid has never given his mother the raspberry? And my 15 year old daughter has been known to spit quite frequently. At me? no…but I’m sure a few soccer players have been hit on more than one occassion, accidentally, of course, with the help of the wind. Maybe everyone needs to be more specific and write a novel rather than just a post so that things stop being taken out of context and people don’t get their panties in a twist. And as for what Wheezy said, she wasn’t speaking to the majority of working moms, just the majority (not ALL) of those working moms replying to this. Do a tally, I’m sure you’ll see she was right.

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