Guest blogger Jessica Katz: More and more birthday invitations have arrived for my daughter, and they all include the same tagline: "No gifts, please." I was the first to send out invitations, so I had no idea that "no gifts" was the politically correct thing to do. During my daughter's bash, beautifully wrapped packages poured in our front door. Now I am asked not to return the favor!

There are so many new etiquette rules, I can't keep up. We just received a thank-you card from someone who'd attended the birthday party. I had thought that I was the one who was supposed to send out thank-you cards! PIus, I was the only mommy not to mail out expensive holiday cards covered in our family photos. I had never done it before, and this was my first holiday as a mom ....

A mom friend with older kids gave me some great birthday-party-survival advice. Rather than asking for gifts, she has everyone bring a gently used book, unwrapped. At the end of the party, she has everyone take one of the books home with them as their party favor; in lieu of a birthday gift, her child keeps a book. Everyone was happy with this system -- until her daughter (age 5) recently started going to other birthday parties and noticed all the loot the other kids had received. But I guess the kid has come to terms with her mom's rule.

Books are beautiful gifts. They have a long shelf life, they're educational and they can be passed down. In fact, my mom just gave my daughter all of my 32-year-old Dr. Seuss books (she had been storing them all this time). So as long as we don't see 5-year-olds with Kindles, giving gently used books is a great way to be both politically correct and generous on a birthday.