No Carbs + No Beer = Mean Mommy

Wanna know why skinny girls are so mean? It's not their personality; they're just hungry.

A Mommy Mid-Life Crisis

I have a weekly mid-life crisis these days, and it feels strangely like the teenage tantrums I used to have. Maybe I am aging backwards? Watch out Benjamin Button!

What I Did on Summer Vacation

Mom's Fantasy Business Trip

Being alone for 24 hours made me realize how much I love my crazy life and the choices I've made.

Church of Clean: A Story of Tween Filth

It is summer. How do I know this? I can walk from one room to another and while I am gone, a hurricane of tween crap suddenly appears.

Please Fire Me

As a modern working mother, I would like to now request being fired from several of the following jobs: Nurse, Bus Driver, Coffee Maker, Cheerleader, Dishwasher, Short-Order Cook, Recycler, Laundress, Dog Walker, Walking Complaint Box, Family Risk Management Specialist, and Shoe Tie Expert.

End-of-School Celebration or Jailhouse Rock?

Ah, the ol' end of the school year celebration: It was like "Clan of the Cave Bear" meets "Lord of the Flies." It was everyone's turn, it was no one's turn. It was Armageddon.

Europeans, Child-Raising and Beer

My husband and I lived in Germany for three years with our young kids. Now I know why people say Europe is a very family-friendly place -- there is beer at every event.

Family Fun Center: Can You Catch Teen Love?

My 11-year-old daughter had her birthday party at a Family Fun Center last week. It looked a bit like a Family Planning Center, if you ask me.

Why I Hate the School Auction

The School Auction. I love to hate it. Every school has one now, and just as we were conditioned to the school prom every year, we now are conditioned to this yearly torture.

Screamin' Meanies: Nightmare Sports Parents

Springtime and softball games. Cut grass and worn leather softball mitts. Cut oranges, freshly raked dirt, smiling girls ... and wait, what is that noise? The screaming? Who are those people?

Welcome to My PTA Nightmare

PTA meetings turn me into the naughty 7th grader I once was.

Book Club Nightmares

I belonged to a Book Club once. It was a group of friends and we were mostly new moms. We drank a lot of wine and never really got to the book part.

Facebook Mommy

Facebook mommy is so excited there was no tinkle in the diaper today!