Why I Win the Mommy Title

That's right -- I said it ... your kid could possibly like me more than you. And here's why.

No Thanks, I Don't Do Dog Poop

Now don't get me wrong, your puppy is cute. Its floppy ears and excited energy are easy to get carried away with, but I DON'T DO PETS! They are messy, they smell, and this one is not trained.

Infantino WTF?

Nanny Diaries: CPR is a Must!

I recently renewed my CPR + First Aid certification, and with the recent news of Billy Bob Thornton's daughter's tragic babysitting experience, I am so glad that I did. In fact, I would say that any parent that does not require it of their childcare provider is a fool.

Nanny Diaries: My Best-Kept Secret

Under normal circumstances, I believe in complete honesty: I tell you everything that goes on throughout the day, the good and bad. If one of your kids uses bad language, or if one exhibits a great kindness to another, you hear about it. But I will never tell you this.

Your Kid's Potty Mouth

It was nice weather this week, so when you asked me to take your kids to the water park, I figured it was a pretty good deal. It was sunny, I was bringing along a friend because three toddlers at a water park is just too much for anyone, but then your daughter opened her mouth and let out a stream of bad words.

The Phone Call Every Mom Should Make

Punctuality in every instance of life is appreciated. I know that it may seem a little ridiculous to think that you need to call home if you are going to be late once you are a parent, but guess what? Those rules from high school still apply.

A Parent's Walk of Shame

I have been a babysitter and nanny to a variety of families over the years, and the one common denominator between all of them is that each and every parent has stumbled home drunk on more than one occasion.

Hey New Age Parents! Your Kid Needs Time Out!

I get that you do not want your overly sensitive wimp of a kid to be hurt, but you are running out of options.

Your Kid Bit ME!!!!

Let me preface this by saying that I love children, but some children are a nightmare and I blame you, their parent.

I'm the Babysitter, Not the Housekeeper

I hate to sound greedy, but if you want me to clean your house you are going to have to pay me more than $10 an hour.

Your Child is NOT Gifted!

Your kid is not exceptionally talented. In fact, she is just a big pain in the ass.

You Are the Worst Role Model -- EVER!

You are the mother and career woman who cannot strike a balance and because of that your kids are suffering.

Shocking Confessions of a Nanny!

No, this is not a joke. Let me introduce myself, I'm one of your many babysitters. Maybe you don't remember me because you have so many, but you trust me with your children's well-being on an hourly basis.