I am also a mommy to a special needs baby. One thing i learned very fast is even if i'm doing something that is for my SN, i ask my other children to help out. Can you get mommy a diaper? Would u like to push the button tonight? Can you read sissy scale for me? I include them in the easy things that i do and i try to talk to them when i am helping their sister. I get things done faster and i am spending some time with them too. Yes its still time that is bassed on their sister, but its better than nothing. I also try and spend at least 1 hr a day with my other 2 children doing something that they each like. I fit this time in once my husband is home from work. its hard, but you really have to squeeze in any time you can with the other little ones. When they are older i'm sure they will understand that you were a busy gal and did the best you can..good luck